Thursday, 10 May 2007

Spider-Man 3: does significantly less than a spider can

Last night, Bolton Central Library's Graphic Novel Group went to see Spider-Man 3.

I like Spider-Man. One commonly-cited reason for his popularity, which I agree with, is that Peter Parker is basically like his readers: he's a bit geeky. Readers side with him because they see themselves in him. Admittedly, he has awesome spider-powers, but there's still a similarity there.

I was ever-so-slightly crushingly disappointed. It was a wasted opportunity, with an excess of slapstick business and whining characters. The first two films were great. This one? Not so much...

The first fight scene is disorientating, not just for the combatants but for viewers as well. Half of the time I couldn't tell who was hitting whom, or where exactly they were, or what the heck was going on in general. Not a good start.

There were two supervillains too many: all it needed was Venom. Sandman and the Green Goblin were entirely pointless. But even he was lame in comparison to his comic book incarnation. Venom should be a twisted psychopath. He should hate Peter Parker and Spider-Man as both Eddie Brock and the symbiote. In the film, he seemed to just whinge about how the emo version of Parker had lost him his job.

Which brings me seamlessly to Emo Parker. Terrible. He pimp-walks down the street. He puts on a pointless and incongruous MGM musical display. He's mean to people. He wears eyeliner. That's how you know he's bad, you see...

My inner nerd (OK, my outer nerd: I'm all nerd) had to see the film, regardless of the bad reviews. Frankly, you'll be much better off reading some quality Spider-Man books instead.